🍋 Private Equity Without Equity

Plus: The investors who made 200x on Wiz, Fed holds rates steady, UBS client’s wife leaves with their wealth adviser, and filmmaker gets charged for scamming Netflix.

short squeez

Together With

“That what each of us calls our 'necessary expenses' will always grow to equal our incomes unless we protest to the contrary.” — George Clason

Good Morning! The Fed held interest rates steady but cut economic growth forecasts, citing trade tensions and tariffs as ongoing risks.

Sequoia, Index Ventures, and other investors scored a massive 200x return on Google’s acquisition of Wiz. Meanwhile, Amtrak’s CEO is out as transit funding faces uncertainty, and Abu Dhabi is pledging $25 billion to fuel America’s AI race.

Elsewhere: A UBS client says his wife ran off with their wealth adviser, and a filmmaker got charged for scamming Netflix.

Plus: Chinese PE and VC firms are asking for more time to deploy capital, the fastest-growing skills in the U.S., and a brain hack to lock in new habits.

Hiring abroad? Avoid fines & stay compliant with Deel’s Global Payroll Guide.

SQUEEZ OF THE DAY

Private Equity Without Equity

2025 was supposed to be the year of M&A, but it’s shaping up to be the year of dividend recaps instead.

With buyout exits scarce, PE firms are tapping debt markets to pay themselves and their investors hefty dividends, sometimes recouping more than their initial investment before even selling the company (effectively getting rid of their equity risk while keeping control).

So far this year, 20+ companies in the U.S. and Europe have borrowed just to fund these payouts.

  • Clarios International raised debt to finance a $4.5 billion dividend, allowing Brookfield and CDPQ to walk away with 1.5x their original equity.

  • Trench Group borrowed €380 million, with €170 million funneled straight into a dividend—returning nearly all of its owners’ investment in under a year.

  • Adevinta AS is securing €6.25 billion, with €1.75 billion earmarked for dividends to Blackstone and Permira, just 18 months after acquisition.

With cash-rich lenders and a weak M&A market, these dividend recaps are proving irresistible. Clarios even scrapped an IPO because debt markets offered a higher valuation than public markets.

But more debt = more risk. Tecta America Corp. saw its credit rating downgraded by S&P after its PE owners extracted $444 million from a $1.3 billion refinancing.

Takeaway: Piling debt onto a company? What could possibly go wrong… Credit markets are playing along for now, but with rising leverage and mounting downgrades, the line between financial engineering and excessive risk is getting dangerously thin.

PRESENTED BY DEEL

Warning: This Guide May Cause Excessive Payroll Expertise

Hiring across borders? Exciting—until payroll, tax laws, and compliance slow you down.

Deel’s Global Payroll Guide cuts through the complexity, helping you stay compliant and avoid costly missteps.

Inside, you’ll get:

  • Country-specific compliance insights

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  • Payroll best practices for seamless payments

Stay ahead of the curve—let Deel simplify global payroll.

HEADLINES

Top Reads

  • Fed holds interest rates steady, still sees 2 cuts this year (CNBC)

  • The Fed cuts economic growth forecasts (CNN)

  • Powell doesn't shy from linking tariffs to inflation (YF)

  • VC firms reap 200x returns on Wiz’s $32B sale to Google (CT)

  • US, Abu Dhabi form $25B AI venture (YF)

  • Dip buyers are feasting on the tariff volatility (YF)

  • Tennis pros file antitrust suit (BBC)

  • Activist investor circles Autodesk (WSJ)

  • Penn loses $175M in federal funding (WSJ)

  • Global fund manager sentiment starts taking turn for worse (Axios)

  • China to outperform Wall Street as American exceptionalism pauses (CNBC)

  • Amtrak CEO steps down amid threats of a transit funding pullback (BB)

  • UBS client says his wife moved in with their wealth adviser. It got messy (BB)

  • Filmmaker charged for scamming Netflix (Verge)

  • China PE & VC firms seek more time to deploy capital (BB)

CAPITAL PULSE

Markets Rundown

Stocks Surge as Fed Holds Steady, Signals Two 2025 Cuts

Stocks climbed Wednesday after the Fed kept rates at 4.25%-4.5% and eased its quantitative tightening pace, dropping Treasury runoff to $5 billion/month from $25 billion starting April.

All 11 S&P 500 sectors gained—tech, consumer discretionary, and energy led—reflecting relief that Powell sees tariff-driven inflation as a one-off, not a lasting spiral.

Asian markets mixed overnight; European markets rose on soft euro zone inflation.

The 10-year Treasury yield dipped to 4.25%.

Updated Fed projections held at two 0.25% cuts for 2025, but bumped core PCE inflation to 2.8% (from 2.5%) and cut GDP growth to 1.7% (from 2.1%), hinting at tariff drag.

Despite a 10.1% pullback from mid-February’s peak, history shows 9.7% average drawdowns in positive years since 1971—9 of 43 years beat 10% dips with double-digit gains.

Volatility may linger amid policy fog, but solid fundamentals suggest staying long-term and snagging quality assets on dips.

Movers & Shakers

  • (+) Shopify ($SHOP) +8% after the company moved from Nasdaq to the NYSE.

  • (+) Boeing ($BA) +7% because the CFO gave an upbeat outlook.

  • (–) Healthequity ($HQY) -17% after earnings miss and increased fraud-related costs.

Private Dealmaking

  • Patricia Industries acquired Nova Biomedical for $2.2 billion

  • TerraVest Industries acquired EnTrans for $546 million

  • Content Partners bought the film library of Village Roadshow for $365 million

  • Proscia, a digitalization software provider, raised $50 million

  • Scimplify, a specialty chemicals platform, raised $40 million

  • Dalma, a pet insurance startup, raised $24 million

For more PE, VC & M&A deals, subscribe to our Buysiders newsletter.

BOOK OF THE DAY

Who is Government?

The government is a vast, complex system that Americans pay for, rebel against, rely upon, dismiss, and celebrate. It’s also our shared resource for addressing the biggest problems of society. And it’s made up of people, mostly unrecognized and uncelebrated, doing work that can be deeply consequential and beneficial to everyone.

Michael Lewis invited his favorite writers, including Casey Cep, Dave Eggers, John Lanchester, Geraldine Brooks, Sarah Vowell, and W. Kamau Bell, to join him in finding someone doing an interesting job for the government and writing about them.

The stories they found are unexpected, riveting, and inspiring, including a former coal miner devoted to making mine roofs less likely to collapse, saving thousands of lives; an IRS agent straight out of a crime thriller; and the manager who made the National Cemetery Administration the best-run organization, public or private, in the entire country. Each essay shines a spotlight on the essential behind-the-scenes work of exemplary federal employees.

Whether they’re digitizing archives, chasing down cybercriminals, or discovering new planets, these public servants are committed to their work and universally reluctant to take credit.

Expanding on the Washington Post series, the vivid profiles in Who Is Government? blow up the stereotype of the irrelevant bureaucrat. They show how the essential business of government makes our lives possible, and how much it matters.

“Who works for the government and why does their work matter? An urgent and absorbing civics lesson from an all-star team of writers and storytellers.”

DAILY VISUAL

A Very Happy St. Patrick’s Day for Guinness Owner Diageo

Source: Chartr

 

PRESENTED BY TRAINING THE STREET

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That’s where Interview SmartPrep AI from Training the Street comes in. Powered by advanced AI and machine learning, it simulates real interview scenarios, coaches you in real-time, and provides instant feedback—so when the actual interview comes, you’re ready.

With Interview SmartPrep AI, you get:

  • Interactive AI Coaching: Get real-time feedback on your answers

  • Practice tailored to Finance Roles: From IB and PE to VC and HF, practice the toughest questions

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Don’t wing your next interview. Train like a pro.

DAILY ACUMEN

Billion-Dollar Start Ups

Big ideas often start small—and messy.

A study of 32 high-value consumer startups, including 25 billion-dollar giants, shows that at Series A, today’s unicorns were often dismissed as niche or crazy—think Airbnb’s “sleep in a stranger’s home” pitch.

They thrived in crowded markets, not empty ones, outshining rivals with better experiences, like Uber retooling taxis or Snapchat dodging messaging giants.

Most reinvented everyday habits—Dropbox beat USB drives, Nest jazzed up thermostats—rather than inventing from scratch.

Untested founders, not seasoned vets, drove 75% of them, proving fresh eyes trump résumés.

And cash? Many, like Twitter, had zero monetization early, banking on users first.

These patterns scream one truth: massive wins hide in plain sight, built on scrappy execution and customer obsession, not obvious brilliance.

ENLIGHTENMENT

Short Squeez Picks

  • How to grow your career at a company you like

  • 5 work habits that are depression in disguise

  • How leaders can encourage learning

  • How to grow in your career if you don’t want to manage people

  • The brain hack that can maintain new habits

  • 15 fastest-growing skills in the US

MEME-A-PALOOZA

Memes of the Day

 

 

 

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